My mind knows it’s not worth it.
That it’s not worth getting angry.
But my body hasn’t figured that out.
My body is tired, tired of constantly being in fight or flight mode.
Tired of choosing fight and regretting it instantly.
The persistent buzz just beneath the surface of my skin.
The swarm of angry bees ready to fight.
My body exhausted, using up energy to smoke them into submission.
But if I don’t,
If I knock the hive and let them loose,
I won’t be the only person stung.
-b.e.
Life will not get the best of you.
You have to fight it.
Prove it wrong.
Prove to the universe that you will not be toppled like a fallen kingdom.
You are worthy of the battle.
You will take a hit and then swing back.
Life will kick you down.
Shove your face into the mud.
You will fight back.
You will push your way back to your feet.
You will triumph over the bruised and bloodied field.
You will be stronger, wiser, smarter.
You are worthy of the crown.
Who you are in this moment,
Is exactly who you are needed to be.
Embrace it.
Embrace you.
Live within yourself
just be
-b.e.
It’s terrifying really,
Knowing that what you want to do
And what you need to do are at odds.
Realizing that what you think you are called to do isn’t really what your passion might be.
Sometimes you just have to find the job that lets you do what you love.
Sometimes it’s the same thing, sometimes it’s not.
Sometimes you struggle with who you really are; outside of a wife
a mother
or a daughter.
I, myself, am a writer; despite my best efforts to prove to myself otherwise.
It’s hard not to feel forgotten
To take every text or short word to heart.
Believing even the simplest note has much more meaning behind it then it truest does.
It’s hard to quiet the voice in the back of your head.
The one constantly whispering that what you think is true.
Yes, he thinks your wrong.
Yes of course she took it personally
Of course they don’t think you’re good enough.
It’s a constant struggle.
A battle between one voice and another.
One that never really ends.
-b.e.
It’s so loud
Deafening, ear piercingly loud
Soft split seconds punctuated by a crash.
-b.e.
Mommy has a little pill.
She takes it every day.
She says it helps her brain work right.
Makes her feel ok.
Without it she can be kind of sad.
Sometimes even mean.
She’ll cry and cry and yell a lot
She doesn’t like to scream.
Mommy’s little pill is small.
But oh so very important.
without it her brain gets foggy
it makes life kind of stagnant
Mommy has a little pill.
It doesn’t change too much.
It’s just one step she takes
to help her feel a little normal.
Because she loves us very much
-b.e.
If I ever tell you You should do something else Think about it And then do not listen to me If I ever tell you you’re not good enough Do not ignore me Let it inspire you To prove me wrong Show me I’m ridiculous If I ever make you feel small Call me on it Don’t let it rip you apart Don’t let it ruin your dreams Make me be better I am trying not to be my father I want you not to be me I am trying to break the cycle I want you to be free -b.e.
the world is so fucking scary right now she writes to her child but you won't know the worst of it at least not for quite a while we'll ride bikes and color read lots of fairy tales we'll spend more time at home we'll spend more time together so we don't feel alone the world is so much different now it changes day by day but until a time you're old enough these will just be the days we played -b.e.
b.e. poetry: A place for my words 